ring the bells!

Theres nothing more soothing than an iced cold coffee after puking your guts up. But let me start from the beginning.

I was too exhausted yesterday to write, so let me start from there. Its 3:36 am and I see aaliyah run to the bathroom. She couldnt make it to the toilet in time, so she is puking from her mouth and poopin water from her butt. I hear raeshawn go, "Mommy, jaedyns throwin up on the bed" Im like tell him to come here. Then he comes in the bathroom and quietly whispers "i poop on myself" and i can see it dripping down his leg. I start running the tub water. I throw both of them in the tub, which i actually stopped doing not to long ago because i decided she was to old to bathe with them. But at 4 in the morning, I just didnt care. So I get them cleaned up and dried and redressed in clean underwear. I send them to bed, only to be reminded that there was still puke on the bed. So i cleaned that off, threw a couple towels over the wet spot and a blanket over that. Then i went back to the bathroom. It looked like a scene from a horror movie. Puke and shit everywhere. And i mean everywhere. I screamed for him to help me, and when he came in the bathroom, he immediatly started gagging and left. God forbid the man smell some nasty shit. With 5 kids, thats something he better get used to now that they in school. It really pisses me off that they have never been sick until they started school. Now i cant keep them healthy.
So after cleaning it up, which took forever, I finally doze off around 6. I had already decided no one was going to school.
So I gave them dry cereal around 9ish and they all laid in front of the tv and went back to sleep. So did I.
It was such a hard day for me, because now Im sick too. I wasnt so bad yesterday, just exhausted from no sleep and feeling down.
Eventually, everything went back into motion, I gave the kids medicine, and they all felt better.
Now by all I mean the big kids. Because at 3 THIS morning I awoke to a spewing sound. A sound i know all too well these last few days. Maine was projectile vomiting all over his playpen, hisself and my floor. I am so tired of puke. I hate puke. He is standing next to me right now and i see some puke residue on his lip. I can smell it. Yuk. More cleaning, more bathing, more washing.
So I gets up at 730 to get the kids ready for school. I make myself some coffee. I didnt smoke a newty because i felt nausous. (i cant spell). But sure enough as im walking out the door i ran to my kitchen sink and projected shit into the sink i didnt even know i had in my stomach. So the kids were late for school because I spent 20 minutes throwing up the devil.
The first thing i thought was, oh no, im fuckin pregnant. Now, excuse my language for all the readers who mught be offended. But hun, I got 5 kids. Do you understand my emphasis? So the whole way to school, through my whole council meeting, the whole walk home, and the 20 minute session on the toilet, all i thought to myself was, what if im pregnant. It better be the flu. I cant be pregnant again. I cant.
Then i wiped.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY TO SEE A PERIOD IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!
TMI, I know. But cmon people. You feel me right???

I am now the happiest person in the world with the flu.